Trust
by middaymoon69
Summary: After Callen finds out what Hetty knows, he needs to find someone he trusts again


"What was her name?" Callen asked, leaning forward the desk, staring at the older woman. His face was pained, desperate for information and Hetty folded her hand, returning his gaze through her glasses.

"Clara. Her name was Clara. I first met her in Langley, Virginia in 1966. Liked her right away. She had been recruited to return to Romania, and I was to be her handler." She told him, seeing his surprise.

"My mother worked for the CIA?" and she nodded.

"And her father before her. You see, Mr. Callen, it's in your blood."

_The revelation of his family; the fact that the woman he trusted with his life, above all others, had lied to him since the day they had met. She had known, all along, who his mother was; his identity; his history and had held it back. He punched the boxer's bag again, the heavy sac swinging away with the momentum, diverting his anger and frustration into the fabric, but still, it wasn't enough._

"Her father; your grandfather, was George Callen. He parachuted into Romania in 1944 to help King Michael overthrow the fascists who had sided with Hitler. After the war, your grandfather hunted down war criminals, including the Comescu family."

"That's when it all started?" he asked and she nodded.

"Yes. He met and married a Roma girl in 1947. That was when the Comescus sought their revenge. He was murdered. She fled to America with their child."

"My mother." He finished for her and Hetty nodded again.

_Callen punched the bag again, and then again, trying to destroy the harmless focus of his anger, his face betraying the emotion he worked so hard to conceal as he heard Hetty's voice in his head again. "Clara. She went back to Romania as a student. That was her cover. For more than a year, everything was fine. But then something happened." He heard her say, punching the bag again, making a small tear in the leather, his knuckles starting to ache from the repetitive motion._

"She vanished. Six years later, she reappeared, desperate to get out of Romania with her children. You and your sister. She contacted me through pre-arranged channels. At the last minute they ordered me to abort the mission." And she looked away from him, her eyes starting to water a little. "We'd agreed to meet on the beach." And Callen felt him mind pull him back to that day; seeing the faceless man pulling the trigger against his mother's temple as she sat under a broad rimmed hat, watching her children play. "So now you know why I went back." And Callen snapped back to the present, shaking his head slightly.

"All these years." He said in a hoarse whisper and she closed her eyes for a moment.

"Forgive me?" Hetty begged but Callen through a nasty look back, despite seeing her tears well.

_All those years of working together, of knowing each other in the intelligence community and she had hid the truth; he thought, punching the bag once more before collapsing against it in exhaustion. Years of trust, broken, justifiably so, but none the less painful. Clara. Clara Callen; he thought again and again, and yet still… he couldn't help but wonder, if anyone knew his name. He had a grandfather once, a mother, a sister, a litany of bodies following him into the present and a bloody future ahead, woven in lies. Shaking his head, Callen picked up a towel and wiped his face clear of the sweat that masked his tears, stitching his stoic face back into place before heading back out to his team._

"Callen?" Kensi called, having seen him walk out of the gym, avoiding Hetty's eye. "Hey; wait up!"

"Leave him be." Sam suggested, knowing that when his partner decided to spar in the middle of the day that something was wrong. She ignored him and got up from her desk, following him out to the courtyard, seeing him pace in circles.

"Callen…" and he looked up quickly, as though remembering to be vigilant. "Is something… I mean…" and she caught sight of his face, the pain he was trying so hard to conceal. "Are you alright?" and he did a short lap of the paved area again, itching to pull his gun out and shoot something.

"I need to get out of here." He muttered and Kensi stepped forward. "I need to disappear."

"Callen…"

"Give me your keys." He practically ordered and she put her hands on her hips.

"No."

"I'll tear the ignition out of your car with a screw driver Kensi; give me the damn keys!" and she shook her head, stepping closer to him and putting a hand on his forearm.

"You tell me where you want to go; I'll drive. If you get behind the wheel in this state, you'll kill someone!"

"Give me your keys!" he bellowed and she felt him try and reach into her pocket, both of them too skilled operatives to allow such an occurrence. She stepped back, pulling them out herself and held them on her palm, staring up at him and waiting for his move.

"Do you want a lift somewhere Callen?" she asked and he relented, letting her walk with him out to her sedan.

"Why are you doing this Kensi?"

"It's me or Sam since you seem to have a problem with Hetty at the moment." And she saw him make a fist. "I get the sense that this is one problem that's not going to be resolved by a trip to the firing range…"

"Just…" he started, shaking his head as she unlocked the driver's side door and waited for him to get in the other side.

"Where do you want me to go?" she asked and she climbed in herself, watching as he did up his seatbelt.

"North."

They drove for more than an hour, neither one of them saying anything as Kensi wove in and out of traffic. They were just about to hit rush hour when Callen asked her to pull over as a roadside diner with a caravan park out the back and she turned into the dirty enclosure, casually parking her car. "Are we eating or changing cars?" she asked, turning off the ignition, watching as he looked around. "There aren't any cameras that I can see."

"There's a trailer, green canopy." He told her and they got out of the car together, heading to the crowded park. Kensi slipped her hand into his as they walked and he played along with the act, the elderly couple in the caravan beside his poking through their curtains to spy on them.

"Key?" she asked and he bent down, reaching under one of the steps to retrieve it. "Are you going to talk to me yet?" and he shook his head, heading straight to the front of the caravan, starting the ignition.

He pulled it out of it's spot in the park and within minutes they were on the interstate, following the directions to Canada.

"Callen… are you ever going to tell me…" she asked after another four hours on the road passing in total silence. He didn't respond straight away and yet he turned off the main road a few minutes later, headed into the foothills of the Cascade ranges. He stopped finally at an old abandoned camp site, marked as closed for the few months that hunting season was closed, and turned to the young woman, words choking in his throat.

"I don't like being lied to." He told her and Kensi looked up at his eyes, listening to the pained face. "Especially not by someone I trust."

"My mother, grandfather… she could have done something…" Callen muttered, sitting on the edge of a rock and watching the crackling fire, the first words about the subject he even uttered.

"Why do you think Hetty never told you?" Kensi asked, turning one of the logs over.

"If I knew, I wouldn't be here, that's for sure." And he looked around the dark and deserted woods. "I hate camping."

"I like it… reminds me of when I used to go out with my dad." And she smiled. "If you're planning for us to spend the night out here though, you better have a tent, or somewhere to sleep in that van; it's about to start storming."

"What are you, rain man?" and no sooner had he said it, the heavens opened up, starting slowly at first and then building into a torrential down pour.

They stood up quickly, Callen grabbing the pot of water off their dwindling fire and hurried into the van, Kensi pulling to hatch closed behind them. She watched as he put the cans of beans down in the pot and then turned to her, running his hand over his head, brushing the rain drops free. It was only then that she became acutely aware that all she wore was thin white shirt; quickly becoming see through as the water penetrated it's translucency.

"I… do you want my jacket?" Callen offered, shrugging it off and she took it gratefully, sitting down on the thin bed, looking around at the cramped space. "I'm sorry I dragged you out here… I just… I wanted to go somewhere Hetty couldn't find me."

"I don't mind Callen." And he sat down beside her. "I'm here for what ever you need."

"You're not going to lie to me… turn around in ten years and tell me that you made everything up?"

"I've never lied to you Callen, and I'm not about to start now." She told him and he gave her a one armed hug. "You and Sam… you're the only two people I really trust."

"What about Deeks?" she asked, referencing her partner and he shook his head.

"I trust him to watch my back… but to keep my secrets? I don't know him well enough yet." And he looked down at Kensi, his face finally starting to relax. "I think I've always been able to trust you."

"I'm glad." She smiled, standing up and grabbing the two cans of beans and a fork each from the draw. "Eat up now though; while these are still hot. When is this food from anyway; WWII?" and she saw him crack a smile, before punctuating it with a yawn. "Tired?" and he nodded. "Is this the only bed in here?" and Callen looked around at the solitary mattress, smaller than a double bed and the thin blanket on top of it.

"There's a sleeping bag in the cupboard there;" he pointed and Kensi opened the gestured door, looking inside. "There was…"

"We're both adults." She shrugged and she tucked into the beans.

"You're right." He shrugged. "And I suppose you're better than trying to share something that size with Sam." And they both laughed, returning to their meager dinner.

"That is true. If he was here, he'd be giving you a lecture, wondering why you didn't have a full survival kit in here and where your new identities were." Kensi stretched her arms above her head. "I don't suppose that there are any spare clothes; like a t-shirt or something…"

"I… I don't think so." But he got up none the less, looking around. "I haven't spent much time in this trailer; usually just when I'm trying to avoid the 'Duchess of Deception'. I don't really keep it stocked."

"It shows." And she finished her dinner, throwing the can into the sink. "Stuff it Callen, don't worry." And Kensi climbed back onto the thin mattress, moving against the wall so that there was room for him.

He sat down a few moments later and looked over at her, watching as Kensi pulled off her boots and dumped them on the floor. Callen flopped back, his head hitting the small, solitary pillow and did the same with his shoes, hoping that would be enough for him to sleep beside his colleague and friend. He heard the cock of a gun and turned his head to see Kensi removing her side arm and stowing it under the mattress, always in reach, though safe for the night and he did the same, praying that their anonymous position would hide them from their enemies.

"Are we going back to LA in the morning?" she asked and he shrugged, committing to nothing. "I don't… I'm not trying to force you to do anything… I just… if we pass a Wal Mart, I could do with some clean socks." And he grinned again, still amazed at how her humor could defuse his dark mood.

"What are you doing?" Callen asked a couple of minutes later as Kensi dropped her head to his chest, pulling his arm into a more comfortable position.

"You've got the only pillow." She replied easily and he folded his arm to rest against her waist. "Listen, I know your mind is going to buzz all night… but I'd really like to sleep… and you're surprisingly comfortable…"

"Kensi…"

"Forget everything. Pretend I'm your girlfriend or something and you decided to go on vacation; just relax; at least for eight hours." And she yawned herself, closing her eyes as Callen hit the light.

Kensi woke up slowly in the early hours of the morning, just as the sun was rising. The rain hadn't stopped and she could hear it against the roof of the trailer. She was warm and comfortable, but more than that, she felt something strange, looking down at her body, a hand tapping slightly on her abdomen, every so often rising higher to squeeze her breast. She knew that she tensed when she recognized the sensation and the hand stopped moving, resting where it was though, cupping the soft flesh.

"I know you're awake too." She said quietly, not looking up and the hand began to move again, a little more firmly this time, a little more daring. "How long have you been up?"

"About twenty minutes." Came the deep voice in reply and his hand squeezed what it could reach through her bra, Kensi covering his hand with her own, guiding it lower till it reached the hem of her dirty shirt.

She guided it up under the fabric, letting him feel her smooth skin till he had pushed the shirt up over her bra, finally looking up as the cold air hit her skin. She was met with an intense look from Callen and he felt the same back as he dipped two fingers inside the cup of her bra, finding the nipple and beginning to play with it. Kensi knew what he wanted; or perhaps needed and at that moment, she was more than willing. "Good morning." He uttered as her eyes fluttered closed, a small gasp not failing to escape his notice as he pinched the sensitive nub. Callen sat up a little, Kensi falling completely against the mattress and he pulled the other side of the shirt up, running his hand over her neglected skin. She resigned her body, lifting her shoulders so that she could pull the shirt clean off and threw it beside her boots, feeling his fingers trailing the line of her throat.

Callen kissed the side of her neck, moving his head down till it rested at the valley between her breasts and felt the sudden change in her breathing; feeling it quicken and deepen, her hands flying up to his shoulders. Kensi grabbed at the fabric of his t-shirt, pulling it up until she managed to get it over his head and finally opened her eyes, looking at the male specimen who was so expertly torturing her at that moment. He wasn't obviously muscular like Sam, but still he was solidly built, definitely pleasing to her eye. She could see the scars from the bullets that had pierced his skin, the knife wounds, even the marks left from his last round in the ring and she ran her hands over each and everyone, like a blind man, mapping them out.

"Do you want to stop?" Callen asked respectfully, despite marking her skin with his lips, just below her collarbone.

"No." Kensi replied hazily, her left hand reaching the lowest of his scars, seeing it slip below the waist band of his jeans and she let her fingers follow, tickling the edges of his groin.

She felt him tense momentarily and then he grabbed her wrist, pulling it back to his eye level. He pulled her bra straps down, tugging at the foreign contraption and Kensi arched her back, pinching the clasp to pull it away, letting him see what was normally covered. Almost instantly, his lips covered one of her nipples and she squealed in pleasure, this time arching involuntarily and grabbing the back of his head to hold him still. Callen made it his mission to tease her, moving from one side and then the other, bringing the nerves to the boil but removing the heat just before stars.

"God… Callen!" she gasped repeatedly and he finally let her go, seeing her nipples standing to attention. "Jesus…" but before she could make another move, he started up again.

Callen slipped a hand down to the tight jeans she wore, slipping his hand into the back where she normally stowed her gun, sinking it just low enough that he reached the parting of her butt cheeks. Quick as a flash, he had the pants undone and at her knees, his palm sliding along the inside of her thighs, watching as he legs fell open of their own accord.

"You really are… wow…" he muttered as she kicked her pants away, lying under him in just her g-string.

"Don't tell me you're going to stop… leave me hanging…" she begged as he kissed her shoulder.

"I hadn't planned on it." He replied and Kensi raised her knee, rubbing it against his patent erection.

With the skill of her training, Kensi flipped him on his back and sat down over his lap. Callen instinctively grabbed her hips as she braced against his chest and began to grind her body slowly over his, the friction of his zipper helping her control herself. He looked up at her near naked body and could almost swear that he had died and gone to heaven, but the tactile senses were intact and he could feel Kensi pulling his belt open. She slipped it from the loops, and deftly undid the button and fly, Callen sighing a little in relief as some of the pressure was released.

"On or off?" Kensi asked, running her hand over the erection still concealed in his boxers and Callen wordlessly lifted his hips, letting her push his jeans off. They joined hers on the floor but before he could even lie flat again, her hand was inside the shorts.

"SHIT!" Callen moaned loudly as she grasped his cock and squeezed him firmly, not expecting the sudden aggression. "Kensi!" and she pumped her fist a few times before letting him go, observing how the shaft fell hard against stomach. "Shit…" he hissed again, staring at her, but then his eyes went wide.

Kensi slid expertly down his legs and, torturously slow, she kissed one of his balls, her tongue darting out to run down the length of his prick.

"Kensi… god, that feels good…" he moaned as she took him into her mouth, letting her teeth rake along the skin. She sucked gently and Callen ran his hand down her bare back, the string of her underwear just out of reach though his fingers itched to touch it. He opted for her breast instead, squeezing both of them as Kensi pulled back almost completely, paying special attention to the head, tasting the pre-cum that was flowing over. "Kens… you have to… it will be over a lot sooner than…" he gasped disjointedly, grabbing her chin and lifting her head up.

"Later." She promised and she sat up, starting to dry hump him again.

Callen grabbed her hip again and pushed the crotch of her thong aside. He examined the slick essence of womanhood and pushed a thick finger between the folds, rubbing it against her clit. Kensi moaned, reaching up to brace herself against the low hanging shelves, starting to buck her hips as he stimulated the nerves. Callen pushed the digit inside her cunt and she bit down on her lip, fighting not to scream as he stretched her out, loosing herself in the haze of sex.

"Callen! Fuck! Shit! I… I'm cumming!" she groaned and no sooner had she admitted the words, she unraveled, thrusting her hips wildly into his hand. He watched, transfixed as she started to collapse against him, but a delicate hand reached out, bracing against his chest. "I need more." She gasped finally and he flipped her onto her back, pulling the drenched cotton away.

He pushed her hair off her face, moving to align himself with her and Kensi wrapped her arms around his neck. His cock tapped against her dripping cunt and she moaned, pulling Callen tight so that he was almost smothering her. He hesitated though and she saw the pause, unsure what he was thinking.

"Callen…"

"We're… we're so close to… I feel like I've been pretty inconsiderate… I haven't even kissed you." He admitted and she smiled, pulling his face down to close the gap. Their lips made easy contact and within seconds their tongues were dueling for dominance, too engrossed in each other to even consider the need for oxygen.

"That better?" she asked, breaking them apart a few moments later and Callen pecked her lips again.

Almost as soon as their lips broke apart, Kensi felt his cock pressing against her entrance and she groaned, arching her hips to give him access. He slipped in an inch or so, already feeling the resistance that came with a tight passage; the best feeling imaginable. Callen grabbed one of her thighs and lifted it over his hip, sinking deeper into her body and she squealed, the lubrication of her orgasm not enough to prevent the friction of his girth.

"Shit… Callen, you're huge…" she groaned, boosting his ego and he pulled himself out a little before thrusting hard, sheathing himself completely. Kensi screamed, Callen groaned and they both started panting as the pleasure built between them.

He began thrusting shallowly after a moment or two of adjustment and she grabbed his shoulders, her nails digging into the skin. Every fifth thrust, he would drive deep, hitting the legendary spot that even Kensi had begun to doubt existed, sending her nerves into a cascade of excitement. They were hot and heavy; two sexually charged adults with months; years even of pent up energy, desperate for the pleasurable release. Callen let a short jet go inside her, holding off to enough of his control as Kensi flipped them over, bracing her body once more as she started to ride him. She twisted her hips in all different directions, feeling him arching his hips to meet her thrust for thrust, and keeping up with her at every change. He grabbed one of her tits again, sitting up to suckle her, his free hand moving south to her ass. Callen ran a finger between the crack and Kensi slowed down, pulling his head back to stare at him.

"You want my butt?" she asked with a twinkle in her young eyes and he shook his head.

"It's a great butt, but I want to watch your face when cum inside you." He replied and she beamed, thrilled by the prospect, bucking her hips again.

Her gently rocking motion become wild as his pubic bone hit her clit and her mouth fell open in a silent scream of pleasure. Callen kept thrusting up, his balls slapping against her ass and he knew that he no longer had minutes; seconds maybe.

"Kens… I'm about to…" he groaned and she grabbed his hand, rubbing it against the sensitive nub to push her over the edge, no longer capable of speech. She screamed loud enough to scare the birds outside the trailer and collapsed forward against his chest and Callen thrust once more before letting go, flooding her body with hit cum. She breathed slowly, her head resting against his chest as she felt him pull out of her body, a warm trickle of fluid spilling between them onto the sheets.

"Wow." She gasped, to content to move. "Wow." He ran his hands up her bare back and then down to her cunt, gathering some of the liquid in his hand before spreading it over her thighs.

"Kensi…" he muttered, kissing her neck again. "Kensi…" and she had the sense that it was the only word in his vocabulary at that time.

Callen stirred a few hours later, jerking awake and looking down at the naked woman still sleeping in his arms. He tightened his grip and Kensi opened her eyes, looking up, shivering a little as she realized that she was cold.

"I… I haven't felt anything that good in along time." She told him, dropping her head back down to rest on his chest.

"Kensi… I…"

"I know. I know what you needed… and I wanted to give it to you." Kensi replied, laying still. "I don't regret it. I won't ever…"

"I don't regret it either." And he sat up with her, holding him across his lap, leaning against the wall of the trailer.

"I said last night that I trusted you…" Callen started, running his hand up and down her bare back, gently massaging the skin. "My mother… her name was Clara."

"That's a beautiful name." Kensi replied, bracing herself finally, for the full story of Callen's betrayal.

"My mother… my grandfather… they were both CIA in their time… but they never knew each other…"

"Do you know your grandfather's name?" and he nodded, looking past her to the torrential rain outside.

"George. George Callen… I guess… that could be my name…" and she picked up the blanket, covering their bodies with it to keep them warm. "And Hetty knew it all."

"She knew about my grandfather… she personally knew my mother… and she didn't get her to safety… she let her die." He muttered.

"Callen, if she knew… I don't think Hetty would have… you know; especially if she knew that your mother had you and your sister."

"Things could have been so different. No foster homes; a family…"

"Things can always be different, you just have to choose your path. Like you now; you can resent Hetty forever, or you can move past it; maybe try and find your father or grandmother… you're getting pieces of the puzzle… you can start putting it together." She rationalized.

"How is it that you're so young, and yet you know what to say?" Callen asked and Kensi lifted her head, pressing her lips slowly against his.

His fingers tangled through her messy hair and she held his cheeks, giving him the physical contact, the intimacy that he had long been depraved of. She held them like that for what seemed like an hour before looking up into his blue grays, searching for that soul.

"You're pretty screwed up, and I know I am too… but… I've learned if you keep holding onto the past, letting it dictate your future, you end up walking with ghosts."

"What do you suggest then?" Callen asked and she grinned, simply, her brilliant smile lighting up her face.

"You just have to let yourself… live."


End file.
